Joyeux Noël

I had a ton of fun for Christmas.  The celebrations started Christmas Eve with cookie decorating. I won for the best decorated snowman cookie. Next we watched Christmas movies and had a sleep over. 

I wish we had The Grinch; it seemed like an appropriate movie to watch on Christmas Eve. However, we ended up watching this really corny movie...I don't even remember the name of it. After the movie we wanted to do something active. I suggested we play sardines.

Sardines is like backwards hide and seek. One person hides and everyone else tries to find that person. Once you find the person you have to hide with them in their hiding spot. The last person to find the hiding spot hides next. 

Sardines is more fun then it sounds. As the group grows it is hard to stay hidden. Also you can see or hear everyone looking for you, so it is very entertaining to hide and frustrating to seek. We made it even more fun by playing outside, in the dark. At first we said no flashlights, but you couldn't see the person standing an arm's length away. There was no way we could find the person hiding. We were running around outside for three hours. 

By the time all the festivites were finished it was 3am. I spent the night at Charis' house, while Josh and Daniel slept at Zach's house. (Both of their houses are in the compound). By 7am the guys were banging on Charis' door. They scared us awake because they knew we wanted to sleep in. But sleeping in meant skipping the Christmas breakfast.  

Everyone was exhausted, and breakfast was long, but yummy. No one's brains were functioning at full capacity. We ate slowly and there was little conversation. We all recieved our stockings filled with candy and small trinkets and left to take a nap.

After everyone was refreshed we went into the village to hand out presents. All the SMs, Bere boys, doctors and their families crammed into the back of the truck. The overflow hopped on the four-wheeler and scooter. We were equipped with mascarade masks and presents to throw out to the people.  

Giving gifts can be dangerous if done incorrectly. People fight each other for the gifts and you can be hit in the cross fire. That is why we didn't stop the car. We drove through the village throwing presents out the back and shouting Joyeux Noël. Crowds of people were running after us trying to get as many presents as they could.  At times we were almost surrounded by people, however, they were being surprisingly nice.  

No one tried to reach into the back of the truck and steal stuff. Many people would shout merci (thank you) as they picked up their present. Yes there were fights that broke out. That was inevitable, but you could feel the Christmas spirit. For example, we tried to throw an older lady a shirt and some soap. (That is a really expensive and nice present for here). She was running to get it, but she wasn't fast enough.  A teenage boy ran past her and grabbed her gift.  We were devestated. Everyone was yelling for the boy to give it to the woman. He did!! He smiled at the woman and handed it to her.  We were so excited. We yelled our thanks and cheered loudly as we drove off. Instances like that are almost nonexsistant in Tchad.  It was nice to see it happen in person. 

I was on cloud nine after that experience. I had some freetime, so I ran home to give my host family their presents. They loved it! I gave them so many gifts, from tooth brushes and soap to jump ropes, bubbles, and balloons. I even crochet personnalized stuffed animals or hacky sachs for each child. After I gave them their gifts we took a ton of pictures. We enjoyed the presents, candy, and pictures together. Sadly, the time for Christmas lunch rolled around and I had to return to the compound. 

Don't get me wrong. The lunch was fun and the food was great.  However, many people were sick, me included. So there was a lot of food left over.  We didn't let our maladies get us down though. Everyone played White Elephant and the SMs playe Secret Santa. I got a Tchadian seat and money for Christmas. Although it didn't feel like Christmas weather wise, you could feel the Christmas spirit for miles around. 

Health Update

Time for an update on my health for all those who are interested.  In the past two weeks I got 5 absesses and two fungul infections. I don't know why I got so many abesses, but the fungul infections have an obvious cause. 

I am still on antibiotc for my scalp infection. Yes, this is the same one I got within the first two weeks of my trip. I took 17 days of amoxycillin, and 45 days of doxycyclin after suffering with the symptoms for a couple of weeks. Doxy worked wonders. 

I would take the medicine for 15 days, twice a day. Things would quickly improve with the medication. However, two days after my treatment I would begin suffering from the same ailments. As of now, I have to take 5 pills every morning because I have another sickness in addition to my infections. 

At first we thought it was malaria. However, after a negative test and not getting deathly ill we knew it was something else. I think I got the flu...two days before Christmas 😢.

It hit me hard because my immune system was (and still is) low due to the various infections. I don't understand why I get so sick here when I hardly get sick in America, but it is happening. Please continue to pray for me and everyone else. Both Daniel and Josh have had malaria 5 times now. Every week someone is sick with something. From stomach viruses, to infections, and malaria, there is no rest for the restless.

Josh's Birthday

Today was Josh's birthday and we went all out.  First the Parkers had a birthday brunch for him. We had German pancakes, eggs, potatoes, etc. I wanted to cry because there was so much good food. We ate and partied all day long. (We have a 3 day break for Christmas).

There were three phases for his birthday. The first was a gag gift.  He got a toy medical kit so he could start practising medicine in the hospital. Phase two was watching polar express at the Parkers. Of course there was more food for the movie. The third phase was the most fun.

We kidnaped Josh. It was 10pm, which is late for Tchad, and we drove down to the river.  Josh had a sac over his head and we were swerving all over the road to freak him out. (There was no one on the road because there is a 10 o'clock curfew, but the nasaras occassionally break that rule). We even had some hardcore classical music playing in the background.  

Once we got to the river we carried him to the riverside and attempted to rip his clothes off his body. It was cold outside, so we wanted to keep his clothes dry. We were trying to be somewhat thoughtful. Josh was fighting us hard. We ended up throwing him in, jacket and all.

Danae, Olen, and Zach jumped in after Josh. They wanted everyone to jump in. I did say it was cold right?? No one wanted to jump in. So Danae and Zach started chasing everyone trying to throw them in. We were running in the dark screaming our heads off.  It was terrifying and thrilling at the same time. 

The only lights we had was from the four-wheeler, which wasn't that bright. People could easily disapper in the moonless dark and appear right behind you.  It was a difficult task telling enemy's and friends apart. 

Thank the Lord I wasn't thrown in the river. Only two people were caught and thrown in.  Once everyone calmed down we gave Josh a drink for his 21st biirthday. Okay, we actually got him his favorite soda and served it on the rocks. It is the adventist missionary way of celebrating your 21st birthday. 

PA or MD

I have been trying to study for the MCAT during this trip. The summer of my return I have to take that dreaded test.  I should be extremely focused and determined to do well on the MCAT right? Wrong. I usually study a hour on a good day, but most days I study 15 minutes...or not at all.

Typically, I am able to stay focused. However, I can't seem to get away. I can't study at my hut (in the village) because the children stand outside my door and yell my name. They want to play with me.  I always make excuses to not study. I would think/say something like, " I don't want to be a 'bad missionary'," and I go play with the children. It is even harder on the compound.

I would try to study in the SM hut, but everyone is going to and fro. They start talking to me or ask if I want to go do something (usually something I really want to do). At times I say no and study....but not that often. I can't find the library of Tchad where there are no distractions. I never have alone time. I can never get away. 

To make things worse, my scores haven't changed. I take sectional exams and every time achieve the same score...to the tee. There is never improvements or backsliding. I wish I would see some sort of change, whether it be good or bad. I need an indicator. I need to know if my study tools are effective or not. I feel like I am wasting my time. 

(I can be a really bad standardized test taker. That is why I am stressing so much...and not studying. I feel that I will do really bad regardless. Studying hasn't helped me in the past and it won't help me now...I know that isn't true. I recognized the reason I am a bad test taker, and a possible way to fix the problem. It's just a matter of putting my plans into action).

As if the stress of taking the MCAT wasn't enough the Nettebergs made me question if I really want to be a MD or not.  I know that if I do well on all the standardize tests in med school I will do great. I'm not worried about anything else in med school. I am confident. I have always wanted to be a doctor and worked hard to achieve that goal. I have many good reasons for becoming a doctor. I even felt that is where the Lord was leading...until now. 

The Nettebergs talk about how you have to be perfect in everything. Not only is it a competition between you and your classmates, but one mistake during med school and you lose your practising license. You are dropped from med school...end of dream.  Once you start your career you can get a malpractice and get sued.  Everyone is trying to prove the doctor wrong. 

I always looked at the good being a doctor can bring and do. I knew all the things they said to me, but the way they said it was new. It really hit home. I am certain I can become a doctor if I stay focused, but the dog eat dog lifestyle isn't appealing. I was prepared for the long, late hours studying, and the pressures of school in general, but I don't want to feel like I am being attack for the rest of my life.  I help others that need it, both inside and out the medical field. I know I should be Christlike and turn the other cheek, but I can't help someone to their feet while they are biting my hand. I will try to help them multiple times, but after-while I get tired of getting bitten. 

The life they explained isn't one that I wanted to live. Especially to become a medical doctor. I want to learn all that I can to be the best missionary possible. The atmosphere med school has can mold my character into something good, however, it also has the power to break me down and reshape me into something else. Something I don't want to be.  

I would always crack jokes about becoming a PA because of the MCAT. But what if I did switch my emphasis? I was talking with a returning short-term missionary who is a neural surgeon. He asked me, "If you had to chose one, would you rather be a doctor or a missionary?" I had time to sit and think about it a bit, but I didn't need too. The answer was easy. I rather be a missionary.  

You have so many options when you are a missionary. Take this trip for instance. Not only am I working under public health, I am an English teacher, a PT, a midwife, a surgeon's aide, a gymnastics coach, the Sabbath school teacher... The list can go on and on.  You can do and be so much. There is always a need. I rather put my energy into the things I mentioned above than see a few patients a day and do hours of paperwork, and there is still the possibility of being sued or other craziness. NO THANK YOU!

Now that I realize I rather be a missionary I need to reevaluate my life. The more you know the better missionary you can be.  I want to be the best missionary I can be. But is the best becoming a PA and learning everything else I need to know, or becoming a doctor?

I have been thinking and praying about this for a long time. I need to figure things out quickly because each choice requires different actions. First off, I am not efffectively studying for the MCAT because of the distractions and I'm confused. Second off, the main reason I need to figure things out quickly, as soon as I get back, starting in the summer, there are two distinct paths I have to take to become a PA or MD. I have to prepare for either one of those paths while I am here. So I need to know what I want to do, which is hopefully what the Lord wants me to do, so I can prepare as needed.

The Missionary Spirit

Recently I have been questioning why people are here.  Many people have come and gone willing to help with anything and everything while others...don't. Let's be real. They just sit in their house or SM hut watching TV shows and movies on their computer.  At first they were like me.  Wanting more work to do because they were bored. However, we have work to do now, but they still sit around and do nothing.

I feel like I am their mother. When there is nothing to do I clean, or try to look for something to keep me busy. These particualr people who just sit there as usual. At first I could careless what others did, but now my work hinges on others.  The PT job I was assigned is a two person job. You have to use all your arm strength to bend and straighten this guys leg.  There is no way one person can do a good job doin PT for 15 minutes straight. The person's arms will get tired and the job won't be done correctly. (Some of the guys have gone with me and they have to take breaks too... I'm not saying this because I am a girl).

Multiple times I had to beg and half drag someone to come with me for PT. Some of the SMs have been very judgmental of Tchadians, and complain in general. I really question where the love of God is in their statements.  I understand they are frustrated because Tchad is a lot to handle. But we were prepared for this.  It is ok to vent, but don't let it affect you work.  Don't let the devil take over.  

Talk about your problems, pray that God will take it away, and move on.  Don't let Satan win!! I pray that it is a minor setback that will resolve quickly. Tchad is a hard task to take on; even the strongest person will find it strenuous. (I'm definitely not the strongest person). I can't handle the stressors of Tchad and the lack of missionary spirit of others. Please pray for all of us. Satan is working hard to stop our work; I don't want him to win!

The OR

Today I was able to help out in the hospital. Both Daniel and Josh were suppose to be in the hospital, but Daniel decided he didn't want to help out today.  So Josh came to my hut and told me if I wanted to help out, be at the hospital in six minutes. (He actually yelled outside my door and freaked me out.  I was still asleep, and I practically jumped out of my cot in fear).

I got there a little late, but before the doctors. I sat through worship, and was ready to help in any way I could. Things were really awkward though. No one told me where to go,  or what to do.  I followed Dr. Bland like a lost puppy as he talked to the other nasaras. He started rounds without saying a word to me. I "confidently" followed him because I didn't know what else to do. I'm glad I did.

There were some short-term nurse anesthesiologists and a short-term doctor doing rounds with Dr. Bland and I. They explained what was wrong with each patient and what they did to treat them. The short-term doctor, Dirk, asked me to be the physical therapist for two patients and even let me take out a patient's stitches. He asked me to scrub in at the OR for an operation as well. (Sadly, I had never scrubbed in before and no one was availible to show me how. So he did his best, while I helped him in other capacities). I was given homework to top off the observations. It was a lot of fun. 

The end of the day turned into a nightmare. We were tricked this morning into thinking there would be few surgeries. However, once we got started patients were being rushed in one after another. The patient I just removed stitches from started leaking pus. We drained the pus by reopening his wound then packed the wound with bleach. We will suture it after the infection is gone. The patient is already on the heavy duty antibiotics because the wound was aquired in a dirty place. 

Next came a keloid, then a hematoma (which turned out to be something else...we don't know what it was), an emergency c-section, a concusion , and two cysts. The cysts patients were the most exciting.  They were both under the age of one. The first baby latched onto me. It was weird because most little kids are scared of nasaras. Their parents tell them that the nasaras will beat them if they misbehave. But, this particular child liked me.  He hid his face in my chest while we gave him anasthesia and waited for it to take affect. Then we quickly removed his medium sized cyst. His cyst was nothing compared to the next infant.

The cyst was the sized of the baby's head and clung tightly to its jaw. It was a difficult surgery because there were multiple major structure in the area.  The cyst was a medial multi-sac cyst. In the end the doctors nicked 3 arteries, which droped the baby's blood pressure a total of 25 points, and popped a few of the cysts.  Praise God that the baby survived the operation. She is doing great. I pray that she will heal quickly with no infections, and have no permanent damage from the cyst, or the operation. 

Naomi's Story

I have written about Naomi before, but I haven't thoroughly explained who she is. Naomi is originally from Nigeria. He father was Tchadian and her mother is Nigerian. Although Naomi has always been a respectful and loving person, she was beaten most of her life.

She was first abused by her father, then her husband, and finally her uncle. To this day she still speaks well of all her abusers, even her husband who treated her worst of all. She was married by the age of 15 due to raped her. Her husband, or boyfriend at the time, "loved" her so much, he raped her. (In Tchad you have to be pregnant to get married. Either the man rapes the woman or the woman seduces the guy).

Five children and many beatings later, her husband decided he doesn't lover her anymore. He left Naomi with the clothes on her back and the children in her lap. She had nothing to her name and five children to support. At first, she went to live with her father and then her uncle after her father died. They both were very abusive. She has many scars from their beatings.  

He father's dying wish was that she return to Tchad and get married again. So Naomi left for Tchad after the government granted her a divorce. (Apparently it is a very long process and you need a ton of proof for why you want the divorce, but she got it). She took her children and the few belongings she had and practically walked to Tchad. 

Naomi had nothing in Tchad. She has many stories about how she would climb a tree 7 months pregnant to get food for her children.  She would often go without food because she gave all the food to her kids. 

One night Naomi had a dream based on Jeremiah 22:3. God told her, "no matter what they ask you say yes." She did just that. The next day someone came and asked her to be a translator. There were missionaries in Bere that needed a translator. (At this time she knew 3 languages. Currently, she knows 9 languages).

Naomi diligently worked with the missionary couple and they taught her many things. One being natural remedies for yeast infections. Most of the time she wasn't compensated for her work, but she never complained. She continued to follow God's leading.

A couple years later the missionaries decided to move on. However, they refered Naomi to Tammy and Jamie Parker who had just arrived from America. At the time they didn't need a translator, but they hired Naomi to do their laundry. As usual, Naomi did her best with her new job. She would tirelessly work for the Parkers.

One day Tammy found Naomi kneeling on the ground. She was bent double near the cement slab she used for laundry. The laundry area was really slippery and many people had fallen there. Tammy rushed over to see if Naomi was ok. Tammy was worried. She asked if Naomi had fallen and if she was ok. Naomi was more then fine.  Naomi said, "I was just thanking my God for this job and all the other ways he has provided for me." 

Naomi is a strong woman of faith. She has many plans in effect that help those in need, and she has many more dreams for the needy. I am trying to make one of her dream a reality. Naomi had continued the yeast infection clinic that the first missionary couple had started.  At first she self-funded the project, and soon Tammy began to help her as well.  

Because Naomi has such a big heart, she gave away the natural remedies for free.  Sadly, the program was never self-sustaining because of it. Both Tammy and I have convinced Naomi that she needs to charge  small fee for the medicine.  Just a dollar for treatment. The amount her patients would have to pay would be less then the hospital, and the program would become self-sustaining. (I have spoken to her about plans for the future to help people who can't pay, but I explained why the program needed to get on its feet first. She fully understands and is excited for the future).

The only problem is we have no money to restart the program.  Naomi gave away the last bit of medication before I started helping her.  We have the plans, but no money to make it happen. It is my pray that people in America will support our cause. Any amount of money will help. $5 can treat 6 people; a little goes a long way. But, I am praying big. My prayers are that we can raise $160 for the yeast infection clinic. The funding will help buy the natural remedies needed and also help with expansion.  In the past Naomi treated 90 people a month. People travel far and wide just to be treated by her. This program can touch many lives, but we need the money to finish what was already started. 

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I am trying to set up a donation button for the yeast infection clinic for easy donations. However, it is hard to set up with slow internet. As of now you can email me and I will tell you the easiest way to get the money to Naomi and I. Thanks.

Close Calls

Josh was returning from America. He left for two weeks because he had interviews for Loma Linda Medical School. Zach, Daniel, and I decided to pick him up from the bus stop when he returned.  I drove the four-wheeler, while the guys took the moto.  

Josh was almost unrecognizable. He was covered in head to toe in dust. It almost looked like he bleached his hair. He had two big suitcases and a carry-on filled with presents and food! It was like an early Christmas. All of his bags were piled onto the four-wheeler, and Josh climbed on the moto. We drove about 10 feet then crashed.  

A drunk was begging for money as Zach was pulling away.  Instead of moving out the way, the man stood his ground.  Zach swerved to avoid hitting him.  The bike hit sand and went out of control. Zach panicked and revved the engine. The guys were dumped onto the floor and the moto sat comfortably on top of them. 

One of the bags fell off the four-wheeler as I took off.  I was turning to catch the bag when I saw the guys fall. I quickly pressed the brakes and sent up a quick prayer. The four-wheeler stopped in time. Praise God I didn't run them over. I picked up the bags, as the guys gathered themselves.  

All the Tchadians flocked around the hurt nasaras.  Everyone wanted to be helpful, but no one was truly helpful. Josh decided he didn't want to ride anymore. He didn't want to fall again. So Zach and Daniel said they would meet him at his house and took off. I tried to offer Josh a ride, but he was tired.  He didn't have the engery to try anything else. He rather walk.

I tried to leave but the four-wheeler wouldn't shift into gear.  I put all my body weight into the lever but nothing happened. A Tchadian came over and started stomping on the pedal. He wanted to show me the right way of shifting gears. He got it into gear by bending it into place. (Remember how I said Tchadians break things the fastest, but keep them running for the longest time). I was able to start the four-wheeler, but now I couldn't lift it into first gear. The guy spent more time trying to bend the lever back into place.  

After the fiasco I had to ride with one hand on the gas, while the other clung tightly to the bags in the back. I had to take a new route to Josh's house and missed a turn.  I basically drove into the heart of the bush. Luckily, nothing bad happened.  Everyone that came out to see the four-wheeler was friendly. No one tried to steal anything from me and I quickly found my error making it to Josh's house safely. Other then a few small bruises and cuts everyone is fine. 

The next close call was located at the river. We went to our favorite spot at the river and were having a great time. The whole group decided to go up stream and float back down. We have done this in the past. It is very relaxing. Basically, we check for hippos during the hike up and enjoy our trip down. 

Tony, one of the Bere boys, and Tammy jumped in first. (There is a 10 foot cliff we jump off of into the water). Allah, another Bere boy, and I quickly followed. Suddenly, I hear Tammy scream. Both her and Tony started swimming upstream. I freaked out. I thought there was a hippo due to the fear in their eyes. I imagined a huge hippo with its mouth open while we were being pulled by the current straight to its waiting mouth.  

I praise God He gave me the strength and energy to swim to the bank. I'm a weak swimmer because I have no indurance. My excuse is asthma and swimming don't' mix very well, but I am able to keep up with everyone else when I am on dry ground. I don't know why swimming and I don't get along, but we don't. 

Everyone made it safely to the side. The only injury occured when I got a spider bite. I grabbed a spider along with the tree at the edge of the river. We struggled climbing the slippery slope to the top of the cliff. It was tough, but the adrineline pushed us forward. By sheer determination (and God of course) we made it. 

During the walk back to the four-wheeler Tammy explained what happened. Someone had strung a fishing line across the river.  There were hooks there size of my hand each sitting a foot apart. The net would have snared us and the current would have pulled us down. Praise God Tammy and Tony were alert and quickly responded to the impending danger.  

To make matter worse, there was a snake in the water too. Allah was able to float over the net because he had an inner tube. He spotted the snake at the waters edge. The snake jumped into the water, and Allah pulled his body as far out of the water as possible. Just as quickly as the snake jumped in the water it slithered out the other side. The snake was a fast swimmer and hungry, however, Allah wasn't its target. Our theory is the snake was eatting the fish off the line.  Either way we dodge two bullets at the river this Sabbath.

High-class Molestation - Part 2

So...I thought I would never see the head military of state again, but I was wrong.  Today he came to the compound and asked for Charis. (I think he confused Charis' name and mine). When the guard knocked on the SM hut door I answered. The molester saw me at the door and got excited.  I quickly told the guard where Charis was, waved to be somewhat polite, then subsequently ran back into the SM hut. (You are suppose to shake their hands twice, once when they fiirst arrive and again when they sit down. Shaking their hands shows they are welcome into your house).

Zach came, instead of Charis, to speek with the head of military. Apparently, he wanted to visit us because we visited him yesterday.  They were talking in front of the SM hut and I had to leave for gymnastics. That meant pants....yoga pants. Pants are acceptable for exercise only (and scrubs), but I didn't want to encourage any actions from the guy. So I grabbed the gymnastics mat and strategically held it over my butt. Both Charis and I politely wave goodbye and left the compound.  

Danae met us outside the gate and asked what all the commotion was about. (She and I are in charge of gymnastics). I left Charis to tell her the story, while I got my host kids ready for gymnastics. By the time I returned, the head of military was standing outside the gate talking to Danae.  I had nothing to hide behind this time. I picked up the youngest child, Filicity, and dragged the other along.  They were walking too slow. I took the mat from Charis and waved bye. I tried hiding behind the kids and the mat as we walked past, but I couldn't. I was ready to melt off the face of the earth.  

While I was getting my kids Danae went to speek to the head of military. She cracked a joke about how he was trying to get her girls, and he got very defensive.  She knew something was up and started to get upset.  The more she heard, the more furious she became.  By the time she came to gymnastics she was still writhing in her not-so-suppressed fury. She basically told the guy off. Danae didn't care what position he held, he shouldn't have treated me like that.  The guard and another worker had tried to smooth things over, but they added fuel to the fire.  She had to leave before she lost all control. 

Danae was so mad she didn't want to start gymnastics.  She sat on the floor festering over the situation. She continued to ask questions about what happened, and what was done in response to his actions. I told her the truth, but downplayed it as much as possible. I didn't want her to do anything in the spur of the moment. She was already a loose cannon though. She got up and said she would be back.  I didn't know what to do. I was left with all the children, who were curiously watching the unfolding events. I started gymnastics without Danae, so the children wouldn't worry too much.

In the end, the guy left before Danae returned.  She she told the guard and worker how I was practically mosested. Then told them to never defend people in the wrong again. Thankfully, we are still on decent terms with the head of military. Zach and Daniel saw him in the market after all the craziness died down. He was more reserved, but his friend bought them candy and offered them cigarettes. Of course the accepted the candy and denied the cigarettes. (The friend I'm talking about is the bigger Tchadian in the pictures I posted in part 1).

Finding Thankfulness

Being in Tchad for Thanksgiving was very interesting to say the least. It is very difficult to find things to be thankful for in a places devestated with sickness, poverty, violence, and death. Many people look to the nasaras and ask "how can we be thankful for this?" in regards to Tchad or their current sitation. It is a tough question to answer. We could tell them that every place has their own problems. Tchad struggles with malnutriition, while America struggles with obesity. Tchad has trouble with flooding, while America struggles with various natural disasters including flooding. Tchadians are always arguing and fighting with one another, while Americans are severly prejudice. (These are extreme generalizations to make a point). However, this responce won't fix the problem. Not only will they disagree with our rebuttal of having problems although we have money, we would all be having a pity party. 

We would be dwelling on the negatives when we should be praising God for what he has been doing in or lives. Yes, it is very difficult. It goes against our natural tendencies. But Paul challenges us in 1 Thessalonians 5:18 to look for the positives and be thankful in all circumstances. As we get into the habit of finding good in everything situation, the good will be easier to find.  If we get caught up with the little things, or even the big things, in life we are giving Satan a foothold. 

Dwelling on the negatives tend to consume our thoughts. Instead of focusing on God and the good He has done, we are focusing on the bad. It becomes a cycle. Our thoughts become actions, our actions become habits, and our habits make up our character.  So we should do our best to focus on the positives. We should aim to be thankful in all circumstances and let the message of Christ fill our lives (Colossians 3:15, 16).

Here are five ways we can be thankful: 

1. We can be thankful for God answering our prayers

2. We can be thankful for God providing for our needs

3. We can be thankful for God's blessings

4. We can be thankful for God's character and wonderful works

5. We can be thankful for our family in Christ

If you notice all of these things are focusing on God. We should continue to focus on God instead of the hardship.  We are called to live in peace. Peace is independent; it doesn't rely on circumstances. Peace is a state of mind that can be acheived with God's help (Romans 8:6). 

High-class Molestation

Today I was practically molested... Project 21 had to pay a visit to the 6 most important people in Bere district. The MCD, the superfre, the mayor, the head CP, the CP of police, and the assailant. Basically, the man who was a little too friendly towards me was the head of military for the state, Tandjile.

I was driving Charis and Naomi on the four-wheeler, while Zach was driving Daniel on the moto. Of course, everyone was staring at us the whole time. We walked over, said hi, and cut to the chase. We explained what Project 21 was about, why we were visiting them (we were brown-nosing, but of course we didn't say that out right), and we gave them a gift. 

After giving them the gift, which was a Project 21 shirt, we took a picture. (Everyone loves receiving photos here, so the picture would serve as another gift down the road). All the Tchadian men were giving Charis and I extra attention before we took the picture. However, because this is usually the norm we ignored it and continued talking. 

By the time we stood to take a picture, the head honcho called me out. He told me to stand next to him for the picture. I didn't want too, but I didn't want to insult him either.  So, I stood next to him and put on a smile for the picture.

Typically, Tchadians don't show affection in public, but this guy obviously wasn't a gentleman. He put his arm around my waist for the picture! I know we usually do that in America, but it is unusual for Tchad. I stood with my arms at my side (how we all should have been posing) trying to grin and bear it. However, the guy grabbed my arm and made me hold his waist too. After the picture he gave me a squeeze and patted me on my chest.  

I was shocked!! Luckily, my hands were close to my chest, so I prevented him from copping a feel. To bad we had to take another picture because Charis was standing too far from the group. (Charis was taking pictures the right way. You keep to yourself with a decent amount of space in between, but it looked weird because everyone else was huddled close together).

Zach saw what the man did, so both he and I protested taking another picture. Unfortunately, the head of military knew a little English and asked us why we didn't want to take another picture.  I gave Zach a look that said it was "ok" and prepared for round two. 

By this time, the crowd that had gathered when we first arrived had grown larger. The man was probably trying to show off because for the next picture he put his arm around my neck. The second picture was taken, then a third, and a fourth. During each picture he would pull me closer, and after each picture he would pat my chest again.  Only Zach noticed what the man was doing.  

Finally, it was time for goodbyes.  I politely shook everyone's hands and turned to subtly run to the four-wheeler. But they stopped Naomi and I. They wanted to know if I was married. Everyone kept saying no I wasn't for sale, but he was persistent. We named an outrageous price when he wouldn't stop asking. (Zach asked for 20 cows, which is a ton of money for Tchad). Mr. Touchy-Pants happily replied, "I would gladly pay 21 cows for her" in French.  I didn't need a translator for that statement.

My eyes grew big and my heart stopped. What do you do in situations like this in a corrupt country? He could have easily made our lives a living hell. Praise God He placed the right words in Naomi's mouth. She was able to talk him down and by the end of the conversation we were cracking jokes. We were able to leave on good terms, but I will never show my face in that place again. 

This is the first picture we took. Notice how everyone had their hands to themselves except for the head of military and I.  Charis was standing far from the guy because he was a little friendly too. Now look at the last picture we took. He kept trying to pull me closer to him as I tried to push away!

This picture has Naomi in it.  The guy was all up in my grill and the other men kept trying to inch closer and closer. There is excuse for us all being that close!

Life and Death - Part 2

Two days later I was called back to watch the same lady's oxytocin drip. She was numb by this point. She would lay on the bed and stare at the wall. I wanted to talk to her although I don't know what I would say. I wanted to comfort her.  It was hard to sit there quietly for hours saying nothing. I really need to learn French.


While I was watching the drip another lady was rushed in. After preping and waiting about a hour she delivered a healthy baby boy.  The boy came out scream right as another lady ran into the delivery writhing with labor pains.


There are only two beds in the delivery room, and both were occupied.  One bed held the lady with the oxytocin drip, while the other held the new mother who was waiting to deliver her placenta. The only spot open was the floor. So, we took the lady's headwrap and laid it on the cement floor so she could sit. While we were preparing the floor for occupancy we hear something drop onto the metal bed. We missed catching the placenta!


The nurse ran to tend to the mother, while I checked on the oxytocin drip. As I was 
counting the drops I felt a hand on my leg and a strong tug. I caught myself on a rusty metal container as my leg slipped from under me. (Praise God I didn't split my head open on the container).


Danae had just walked in and saw the whole thing.  Everyone was laughing, but also a little concerned about my safety. We tore the lady's hand from my leg and told her to stop. We even positioned her so she could grab onto a pole on one of the beds. But she liked my leg.  The lady on the ground decided I looked like a wonderful stress ball and used me as all she wanted. She squeezed twisted and pulled at my legs. I finally got fed up and let her abuse my leg.  No matter what I did or said helped the situation.


Finally, the drops were in cadance and the bed was ready for the lady waiting on the ground. (By this point there were ants feasting on the bodily fluids the lady left on the cement floor. We have a very sterile atmosphere if you haven't noticed). She was a difficult woman to deal with although the baby came out with ease. It was a healthy baby girl.  She latched onto the breast and wouldn't let go, just like the placenta.


The placenta tore on its way out. We had to clamp the remaining piece and wait for it to slough off.  Thankfully, the placenta came out after a few minutes of waiting. We tried to remove the blood clots that coagulated in the uterus, but the woman was stubborn. She said that it hurt and she wanted us to stop.  She kept trying to push our hands away and close her legs. In the struggle she knocked the basin onto the floor. The basin contained her placenta and other things we didn't want all over the floor.


Blood and feces splattered everywhere. It covered most of the floor. Danae got frustrated and told the lady that she would leave the clots in her uterus. She would continue to bleed until all the clots came out.  The lady didn't care. She rolled over and fell asleep while she cuddled the baby.


Another lady ran into the room, before we could start cleaning the floor. To top things off, the couple from France walked into the room. (The wife is a midwife and the husband used to work for SAR (search and rescue) in France. I don't really know what the husband will be doing here, but the wife is helping Danae). Perfect timing right? We found the cleanest spot on the floor and had the woman sit. We doused the floor with bleach and swept the liquid outside. We finished cleaning everything as fast as we could as the French lady, Ana, watched. The nurse check the mother's uterus and sent her out of the room.  Everything was fine for that particular mother.  


After cleaning the bed, we helped the woman on the floor into it. Danae went home to feed her baby, so she left Ana in charge.  Ana had some...unusual tactics. 
She made the mother get into weird positions and push.  I'm sure it was meant to make things more comfortable, but Ana was confusing everyone.  The mother was listening to Ana, but was getting a little frustrated.  I was completely in the dark while Ana explained to the nurese why she was doing what she was doing.  It was like I ceased to exsist and the nurse took my place as student.  


It got closer to delievery time and Ana wanted to check for a heartbeat.  She had given up on positioning the woman into more comfortable positions.  The mother simply laid on her back and grabbed her legs.  Ana tried to find the baby's heartbeat, but couldn't. She didn't like the machine the hospital had and wanted her own tools. (She even tried to put her ear to the stomach hoping to hear the heartbeat. Her mouth was very close to the lady's vagina and it made me uncomfortable). So she left the room and went all the way to her house just to get her bag of toys. 


By the time she returned the nurse had already found the heartbeat, which was slow, and we prepared the needed tools (the aspirator and bag valve).  The head was already in the birth canal, so there was very little for Ana to do. However, she continued to try.  Ana pulled out her steoscope and listened for a heartbeat. (I honestly don't know if she found the heartbeat or not).


By the time the baby was born Ana completely took over. Without gloves she caught and aspirated the baby, then massaged the uterus. To make matters worse.  I was ready with the aspirator, but she wanted to use her own tools.  So she ran to her bag and grabbed her own.  Hers wasn't working, but she still didn't want to use the hospitals.  She took off one of the tubes and put it down the babies nose. She sucked away occasionally stopping to spit the amniotic fluid out of her mouth.  Ana took her time and didn't use proper BSI (body substance isolation). Tchad is known for HIV and AIDS, along with many other diseases passed through bodily fluids.  I am glad that she isn't afraid to get dirty, but she needs to take preventive measures.  


Also, the baby had a slow and weak heartbeat.  She should have quickly aspirated the baby and tried to stimulate a cry. The saying in the maternity ward is "you have to beat them hard or else they will die". Ana wanted to rub the feet and the back and wouldn't let me or the nurse touch the baby.  I praise God the baby didn't die. This is the first time I have seen soft rubbing work on a Tchadian baby.  At times I would try to stimulate cries with sternum rubs using my knucles and the baby still wouldn't cry.  You have to hold them upside down and give them 3+ slaps on the back like you are spiking a volleyball.  


All in all, I am more worried about working with Ana then Danae at this point. Ana is use to working alone and speaks very little English. Not only does she do all the work, she can't explain everything that is going on because of the language barrier. The sign language and broken English/French that the nurses and I use are to much for her to handle. I would be exposed to labor and deliveries shadowing Ana, however, I wouldn't learn, or do, as much as I can with Danae and the other nurses. 

What I'm Thankful For

I am thankful for...

- Not having headaches from my scalp infection or malaria over Thanksgiving

- For my loving host family that serves me wonderful food, treats me with respect although I am a woman,  and are so much fun to hang out with

- Having a bountiful feast for Thanksgiving

- Being able to use the SM hut. It has helped me keep my sanity.

- THE PARKERS!! and all the other SMs that have made this trip even more fun

- The TBAs and CHWs. They are working hard and absorbing all the knowledge we place before them. They are truely making an impact in the Bere districts. 

- Naomi. She shows me all the ropes.  Without her I would be hopelessly lost.

- Being able to feed the malnurished children in the hospital. Ya, it gets a little hectic at times because we are giving away free food, but the children love it. Needless to say, they need the food too. 

- The fan that keeps us cool when the temperature is over 100 degrees. It only gets hotter from here. 

- Cold anything!! It is so hot here

- Friends and Family in America

- The internet.  Without it, I wouldn't be able to stay as connected to everyone in the US and share my experiences thus far. 

- God giving me the confidence and courage to keep going, and always being there every step of the way. 

Prayer Requests

-I will be shadowing Danae because she is an OB-GYN. I want to be an OB-GYN, so it makes sense to learn all I can from her. However, as I explained in a previous post Danae is like a dynamite. I pray she doesn't bite my head off when she explodes.

-Appo (one of the Bere boys) has giardia and typhoid, Allah (another Bere boy) has typhoid and malaria, and Tammy has typhoid. The common sickness is typhoid.  How and why did this happen? Tchadians don't use toilet paper. Germs spread via the fecal-oral route and typhoid is contracted. GROSS!! I pray that everyone feels better and that the Bere boys learn to wash their hands after using the bathroom, so no one else gets sick. 

-Project 21 is a great program and can do great things. However, we will run out of funds by December... I'm praying for a miracle. I know money will come in with the Lord's help. 

- One of the babies in the baby formula program came to the hospital with an open clavicle and tibia fracture. His parents waited a full week before taking him to the hospital!! Now he has a massive infection.  I pray that he will heal quickly. 

- Mundon Justin landed on his head when he dove into the river.  Honestly, it made no sense why he dove. Everyone, including him, knew it was shallow. Anyways, currently he is wearing a neck brace because he has no feeling in his neck. His face is a little scratched up too, but his neck is obviously the concern. Bere doesn't have a MRI, so we don't know how damaged his spine is. 

-Pray that I will continue to walk in the way of the Lord. I pray that I don't become callused to all the hardship here.  I want God to use me all He wants. Pray that when He leads I will follow, no matter where he leads.  

- Pray for my health as well. The scalp infection I had at the beginning of the trip is still plaguing me.  I took Amoxy for 17 days, but it never went away. The unceasing itching and oozing toned down and almost stopped on day 9. However, it never completely healed. About a week after I stopped taking Amoxy the bumps returned with a vengeance. The itching was bareable, but the pain was immense. It got to the point were I couldn't put my hair in a pony tail, even if I wrapped the band once.  I would get excruciating pressure headaches from the slightest bump or touch. Sleeping became very difficult.  Next, I tried doxy. It worked wonders. The pain left within 4 days and the itching stopped. My lymph nodes drastically decreases as well. By the end of my prescription all of the symptoms were gone. All I needed to do was wait for the bumps to go away.  They laid dormate for weeks and I didn't think they would be a problem. Maybe they weren't a problem and the infection was hiding elsewhere. Nevertheless, after finishing 15 days of doxy my infection came back within 2 days. Instead of many painful bumps there is only one that is causing me a world of trouble. The headaches are so horrendous it hurts to chew. I don't want to do anything... Currently, I am on doxy again. Pray that this time the doxy will completely wipe out the bacteria.  

- Lastly, continue to pray for everyone else.  I continuously pray for all of you, and I hope you are doing the same too. 

Life and Death - Part 1

Today I was supposed to go to the river, but instead I was called into the hospital.  Danae wanted help in maternity. The hospital doesn't have an oxytocin pump, so I had to monitor the drops. I had my swimsuit under my scrubs ready to burst out of the hospital and jump into the river.  It was over 100 degrees inside, but I managed to stay focused anyway.

For two hours I watched the oxytocin. Second by second, drip by drip, nothing was happening. Although the patient had been on the drip for 6 hours, she only had a few sporadic contractions. We had been trying to induce her for seven days. The patient had already lost many babies due to chronic hypertension. Danae chose to induce labor because she was determined to save this child. Sadly, the baby died last night. 

While I was making sure the solution stayed in cadence, another lady was rushed in with a TBA close behind her. She had contractions 4 minutes apart. I didn't speak enough French to understand what was going on. So, I did what the doctor ordered and counted the drops.  

It was so sad watching the lady.  She was  heartbroken over losing her child. The other lady screaming due to labor pains didn't help the situation. Even the sound of a baby crying set her over the edge.

When the medication was complete, the IV was removed and the lady left the room. (Apparently, the nurses were supposed to give me another drip until she was in active labor. They didn't do what they we supposed to and Danae got really mad at them). I was about to leave as well. However, the head nurse stopped me and told me to put on gloves. She wanted me to assist in delivering the baby. 

It was me and the nurse. I tried not to panic as we prepared the delivery kit.  Let's be real, the previous delivery I watched was already prepared. The nurses worked quickly and efficiently.  It was so fast that I couldn't see every little detail that took place. To top things off, last time I was solely observing. Now, I was actually catching the baby!!

After waiting about half an hour the baby was born. The nurse clamped and cut the the umbilical cord then handed the child to me. It was a health baby girl. Thank God she wasn't in distress. (That means the nurse did all the hard work). By the time I finished cleaning off the baby Danae came back and told the nurse I was a newbie. So the nurse starting teaching me. She tried to explain what to do in simple French for the next delivery. I actually understood most of it, and learned a lot. Next time, I'll be even more ready!

Pictures!!

This is a picture from our family planning demonstration.  We had people demonstrate the proper way of using and disposing of a condom. Many people use the condom and throw it on the floor.  Curious children pick up the condom and are exposed to HIV and other STDs.

This is me on the drunk horse during the Kouroume celebration.

Look how many people are there!! It was so dusty.

The dance floor during the Kouroume celebration.

Project 21 in our african outfits. From left to right it is Daniel, Josh, Me, Charis, and Zach.

Look what we get to pull. Every Wednesday we have people come in with teeth like this.

These Arab boys were so adorable. You often see little boys all the way to grown men holding hand here. It isn't because they are homosexual. It is because they are friends.

I braided Josh's hair!!

We spent the day at Naomi's house and learned to cook like a Tchadian woman. We pounded, grinded, chopped and mix for hours, but the food was great.

This is my thrid grade class. We decorated the classroom after this picture was taken, but I haven't taken another picture yet.

Normalization

Things are becoming more normal now. It may be that I am getting used to everything Tchad has to offer, but it is starting to get hard to find unusual things to write about.  I have a set schedule and distinct tasks that need to be finished. But for now, I've got a few things that I still find unusual/ news-worthy.

Finally, after being here for over two months I swam in the river. The first time was on Sabbath, after we taught branch Sabbath school. I didn't bring my bathing suit (I wasn't told we were going swimming this time...well they didn't tell me in advance), so I planned  to watch the Bere boys enjoy the river.  I guess that wasn't a good enough excuse because Allah (one of the Bere boys) pushed me in. The most surprising moment of that trip was when Tony (another Bere boy) pushed Josh in the river.  Tony is EXTREMELY quiet and shy. I wasn't surprised when Allah pushed me in, but Tony?! That was unexpected for sure.  

The next river trip was a Project 21 trip. The trip was suppose to be a bonding time for Zach, Charis, Josh, Daniel, and I. Charis got sick the day before, so she didn't want to go. Therefore, it was just me and the boys.

The trail leading to the river is very sandy. I was riding the moto with Josh and we almost fell because of the sand. After we regained balance the bike broke down.  We had to push it all the way back to Bere. In the end I decided to stay, while the guys rode to the river.  That meant 3 guys on a small little moto. (We only have two motos). It was a sight to see. 

Four hours later they come back carrying the break from the moto. Apparently, the sand wasn't what got the best of them.  It was a cart being pulled by cows.  The wagon took up the whole path and there was no way around it. Zach, who was the driver, tried to pull to the side of the rode but revved the engine by mistake. The bike took off and they crashed into a tree.  It wasn't until later that they realized the break was missing.

In total they fell four times and crashed once.  They were determined to make it to the river. They rode to the river, swam, and rode back without a break.  Thank God the only injuries acquired on the trip were one wounded toe and a small Tchadian tattoo (a burn from the exhaust pipe).

In other news, I was finally able to get into the hospital. Well, I was always in the hospital, but I was able to watch a delivery. The woman in labor had already had four children and was trying to bring the fifth into the world.  It was pretty cool to watch.  We broke her water, waited, waited some more, and then waited a bit more.  The baby was supposed to be in a little distress because there was poop in the amniotic fluid, but things didn't get hectic.  We waited 45 minutes AFTER she was fully dilated, then she quickly pushed out a baby girl. After aspirating the infant and beating it a bit the baby started crying.  

I also got to play doctor with a TBA (traditional birth attendant) and a CHWs (community health worker) in Project 21. Two different people approached me with different problems.  The CHW was practicing taking blood pressure on his mother and found out that she had extremely high blood pressure. He brought her to me to double check his work.  The TBA had a large mass in her left breast.  Although you can easily spot the mass from a mile away she made me palpate her breast. She wanted to ensure I fully understood what was going on. Honestly, all I could do was check her vitals and send them to the hospital. I'm not a doctor. (The TBA ended up having breast cancer). 

The teaching aspect of my trip has been going well too.  I have been teaching my host family English while they teach me French.  They are learning so fast.  First, we review, then color two pages in the coloring book and name all the animals on the pages.  They love it.  Between that and gymnastics, I do something with them every night.  

The students at school are wonderful too. Every time they see me they shout my name or sing one of the songs I taught them.  They are always bragging to their friends because they have a nasara teaching them English.

Wow. After writing all of this I realize there is still a lot to write about! There is always something new and fun happening. However, these occurrences don't seem as drastic or surprising as they used too. 

Preparing for Battle

"The horse is prepared against the day of battle: but safety is of the Lord." (Proverbs 21:31 KJV)

Durng my nightly devotion I came across the verse above. It didn't strike me as something special or meaningful in my life. Let's be real, I would have missed the relevance of this verse if it wasn't for the Life Application side of my parallel study Bible. This is what it had to say about the verse:

"This proverb refers to preparing for battle. All our preparation for any task is useless without God. But even with God's help we still must do our part and prepare. His control of the outcome does not negate our responsibilities. God may want you to produce a great book, but you must learn to write. God may want you in foreign missions, but you must learn the language. God will accomplish his purposes, and He will be able to use you if you have done your part by being well prepared." 

Wow. I would joke with the other SMs saying, "I learned a little French before coming here, but now I stopped learning." It is a sad, but true statement. When I got here I knew more French then any other SM. Now, we are all on the same level. I have almost moved backwards because I never use my French. 

The reason I don't use French is not due to lack of exposure. I am in and out of the hospital everyday, I play with my host family and the Bere boys, I try to do all that I can with the community. I haven't learned French because I am scared. I may know enough words to get my point across, but they never leave my lips. I make motions as I try to say the words, however, they understand the motions before the words come out. 

I stopped studying and learning although I really want to have conversations with everyone. I would blame this person and that person for the lack. The lack of work, the lack of exposure, the lack of anything and everything. I'm not saying I was complaining the whole time, but I have been really frustrated. I like to stay busy and feel useful, but everything in Tchad relies on someone else. 

This verse threw the blame back into my face. In all reality, I would have more work if I learned the system enough to start something on my own. Nobody is stopping me. I would have more exposure if I knew the language enough to speak with the patients. I would be able to do more and be more for Christ. I know God has brought me here for a reason. However, I am suppressing His blessings and miracles by not preparing myself. Instead of blaming I need to be training. Learn from my mistakes. Be proactive. Take the initiative. Do what it takes to be prepare for God's work and He will bring you to new heights.  

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To all my readers: I love your comments and feedback. I receive the comments as email, but I can't reply to them because of the internet. If you want a reply or conversation you are welcome to email me. (shannicebaker@gmail.com). If you don't care I love the comments too.